27 April 2009


I have not been in many relationships, but I have been in enough to be familiar with Ex-Boyfriend Syndrome.  EBS is that most devious of syndromes which exerts itself mainly through the thinking of thoughts such as, "Well, it wasn't that bad, I mean there were some good times!", "He really was kind to me...that one time" and "Maybe we rushed into breaking up".  EBS (or, EGS for men) shows up approximately 7 days after the breakup and may result in late night trips to Target for fatty foods of all varieties, marathon chick-flick watching, and--in serious cases--a rekindling of a relationship.

I have EBS with North Park University.  

After months of looking forward to the proverbial breakup between me and North Park, the time where we would collect the others' belongings and return them to their original owner--me returning my apartment keys, it returning my long lost sanity--I have started to look back.  And sigh.  That is no good.   In an attempt to alleviate the symptoms of EBS for NPU, I have compiled the following lists:

Reasons It Will Be Sad to Leave North Park
1. I will no longer be able to stand on my back porch watching Eric Martin and Dan Johnson sing "Hero" to Eric Landin's window
2. Greenspace
3. No more getting free donuts from Scot McKnight when the men's soccer team is selling them as a fundraiser in Carlson

Reasons I Am Looking Forward to Leaving North Park
 1. I will not be cat called daily on the street in Alaska
2. I will not be in a long distance relationship once I leave North Park
3. Homemade food.  In a kitchen that works.
4. I can have a pet
5. No more classes, no more books, no more professors' dirty looks
6. I can read what I want to read when I want to read it
7. No more Rabbit People

...I will update the list accordingly as Finals Week progresses.  

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